ringing in the new year!!!

wehoo....Happy New Year!!! Well almost. I will probably be asleep when the ball drops so I just wanted to go ahead and get it out. I have so many things to look forward too in 2010 and im excited to leave 2009 behind. I want to say thank you to all of my friends and family for everything they have done for us as well as being there for us. I hope that this next year brings you everything and more. Have fun tonight and be careful:) talk to you next year!!!!

high five for surprises!!!

first things first...Merry Christmas!

Now on too the good stuff. For those of you who know me you know that I love surprises. Any and all kinds! I like to be surprised and I love love love to be surprised. I'm pretty darn good at it too. Two of my best surprises have involved Tommy : His first birthday after we started really dating is by far my favorite. I had bought him a big screen tv. At that time the best thing out there a 52 inch big huge box. He had no idea that I had purchased this. I had it picked up by one of his friends and stored at there apartment until the big day. Andy and his room mates loved this week by the way and I was a little worried they wouldn't give it back. Well we had been talking all week about what he wanted to do for his birthday and we had decided we would just do dinner with friends.( I had already made reservations at a Japanese steak house with all his family and friends...he had no idea) We didn't choose any details just the basics. Everyone said they were available. Well the day before and the day of I had almost everyone call and come up with reasons why they couldn't make it. He already though his parents had other engagements so he thought it was going to be me and one other person. So the day of...actually an hour before.... I asked him where he wanted to eat? We went back and forth over a few places and I "guided" him towards the right decision. In the end HE CHOOSE the Japanese steak house. So we got in the car and headed that way. We parked and walked in. He was walking towards the hostess when he glanced to his right and there sat all his friends and family. SURPRISE!! He looked at me and said I just choose this place like five min ago:) I know. Then at dinner I gave him a bag with a remote in it. He did not believe that a tv went with it.

The second best was his most recent. Most of you were involved in this one so I will not go into major detail. I just set up a surprise party for him at a great place The Rucker House. I invited everyone he new including a friend that lives in Kentucky. He thought we were picking up a wedding bouquet from the location and once again SURPRISE!!! He was so surprised he reached for his gun...luckily wasn't wearing it so no one got shot:)

But as you can see I love it. Its the best feeling for someone to get something or have something planned they had no idea about the smile on the face is the best. When me and tommy started dating and ever since we have been up and down in the money department. I always tell him its not the price or size of the gift that matters. Its the thought and hopefully the surprise. I explained to him if he could surprise me with flowers from the garden I would be happy. The issue is he isn't very good at surprises. He tries oh so hard but something always goes wrong and I find out. Whether it be someone slipping up and telling me, or him mentioning things that pertain to the surprise and I guess. But that was not the case this morning.

Its Christmas morning and we are opening presents. I feel awful by the way because I did not get anything spectacular or have any surprises for Tommy. He new everything he was getting because he picked it out. But with our money situation I could not do any of the grand things I wanted to do. Back to the story. Im opening my few gifts and for the most part I too new what I got because I gave him a list. shoes check, long coat check, sweater dress check, what is this under the sweater dress? Holy crap my husband bought us two tickets for the cruise that all are friends are going on:) Did you here me:) !!!!!! All of our friends have booked a Cruise awhile back and we were not able to book or even think of going due to lack of funds. This has been something I have been upset about because not only do i need a vacation but what in gods name was I to do for a week while all of my friends are on a boat with out me? But no worries I will be there and loving every minute of it. Did I mention that he surprised the crap out of me. I had no clue. Since there was not enough money in the account he had access too for Christmas and i know he didn't use my business account. He found funds and pulled it off. He only told two people...my mom because he had to make sure we had a sitter for cadence for five days and Justin because he needed to know what too book.

So thank you baby for a great surprise!!! I would have been happy with the shoes and a hug from you.

now i have to get a tan in three weeks and lose about ten pounds...any suggestions on a fast diet:)

hair

Hey friends....I need your help! Im wanting a change and I need your help. I have been toying around with the idea of cutting all of my hair off. I am just tired of my hair being blah most of the time and I do not have the time to spend on a long hair cut to get that hollywood wave going so this is what im thinking..... what do you think?

Do you think this will look good on me or should I go for a different style or a little longer? I also don't know if I want to go dark like this or stay blonde....what are your thoughts? I have had short hair before although it was about five years ago so its not a huge deal but im not sure...Please help me decide.

christmas tree farm

So last Sunday we took a family trip to the Christmas tree farm. Since I was a little girl I have been cutting down my Christmas tree. Although every year there was tons of fighting between everyone on which tree we would cut down, it has always been something that I look forward too. Having two sisters it is very hard for any of us to decide on one tree. We usually all decided on a tree that was four feet to tall to fit in our house. This is another one of my family traditions that I have forced on Tommy. So last Sunday we head out to a Christmas tree farm to cut down a tree. Last year we visited a farm in gardendale that apparently was too hilly for everyone as well as not having the correct type of tree. So this year I did some more research and found a few new farms to choose from. The one I choose sounded great from its website. It boasted live reindeer, petting zoo, hot apple cider, the right type of tree ( Virgina pine for those curious) and hay rides. Not too mention the directions claimed just minutes from Birmingham.

Well 45 minutes after leaving our house we arrived at the tree farm. We pull up and it looks promising. We see tons of people, a horse drawn hay ride and of course lots of trees. We brought both the dogs so at this point they are hyperventilating to get out of the car. We get out and get right too it. We walk around looking at the trees and of course the first one i see i want. The fact that is was probably the size of my living room wide and two floors tall was not stopping me from saying I want that one. After Tommy stands next to it with his hands reaching up showing me it is at least three feet taller than his reach finally snaps me back to reality. On to the next tree. After looking for awhile we find a tree that we both seem to like. We look at it from all angles, go look at other trees and then come back to this one. We decide to walk over to the petting zoo before cutting it down so we do not have to hall a tree all over the farm. As we walk towards the petting zoo Cadence is all excited about seeing the reindeer....i mean two donkeys. Yup that's right either the nice writer of the website doesn't know his animals or the reindeer had already left for the north pole because there were just two donkeys. And the petting zoo consisted of a whole bunch of goats and a rooster that from what i could tell wanted to peck cadences eyes out.

So after petting the goats, sitting on the donkey and having to chase the rooster away a few times we decide its time to cut down our tree. we head back in the direction of the tree we had decided on. On the way we look around at some other trees just to be sure. We agree that the tree we choose is the one we want. At the time we saw one whole but decided it would go in the back. Commence cutting...go on Tommy get on that:) The tree is then bound and loaded up. Time to head home.Both the dogs and Cadence are so tired. Even with some of the false advertisements we had a great time.

We get home 45 min later and its time to put the tree up. Tommy starts trimming to make it fit in the stand. While trimming he trims a bit much and it doesn't want to stand in the stand. If we cut more branches off to make it fit down in there then there would not be much tree left. So we rig it up. Its up for the time being. We put it in the living room and stand back. What the he double hockey sticks happened? I am pretty sure that while we were picking this tree we were either drunk or blind. There are holes all over this thing. There is not one side with out a whole. It is so bad that Tommy wants to toss it and go buy another one at the tree place on 31. I'm not kidding he could care less that we paid a pretty penny for this tree he wants another one. After some laughing and caressing the tree still stands in our living room. Now with all of our trimmings on it it doesn't look THAT bad. Next year we will once again go cut down our tree but next year we will take someone else so that they can tell us the tree we want is not very good and we need to pick another one.
Merry Christmas!

oh how I wish...

so i have completely forgotten the other topics I had put away for some great blogs and now I am left to write about what I want for Christmas. I will start with my never gonna happen list and then go onto the possible list.

In my dreams:
New car preferably a range rover
a house with a good yard
Tickets, hotel and plane ride to the National championships
Tickets for the cruise...i so wanna go

if anyone reading this happens to have a way to get any of this free or has lots of money and need something to spend it on please feel free to purchase these things for me:)

Possible:
shoes there are some really cut brown jessica simpsons and a cool light purple pair i want
some sweater and long sleeve shirts
new pair of jeans I want a dark pair of sevens
running clothes..pants and long sleeve shirts
makeup
A long jacket
new pillow

so as you can see my wish lists are very far apart but that doesn't mean I cant wish and hope. Hope you get everything you wish for :)

topic 2: i need a diet!

so I am going to post some pictures that quite frankly make me want to go on a major diet to get back to the size i used too be. Or make me wonder how I ever was that small. Dont get me wrong...I do not think I am fat or anything like that. Yes like all females on the planet I would like to tone and move some stuff around. For example if I could put some of the extra I have on my hips and move it up that would be great...I would have to buy bigger bras and smaller pants sounds like every girls dreams. But this is a bit ridiculous I used to fit into these


Yes those are a pair of my two year olds shorts next too a pair of my shorts from just four years ago!!! So back too the topic....I know that they have stretch and all but I do not really remember ever being that small and I am not sure if that is very healthy. this was just something I thought was funny and wanted to share:)

eating alone

so i have had like twenty ideas over the last week of things to talk about in a post and I will try to remember them all. so here is the first one.

What is your take on eating alone? Like at a public place? This is something that doesn't bother me at all but I know some that would never dream of doing it. The other day I was waiting on a friend to get off work so we could go tacky outfit shopping. I was hungry and wanting some zoes. So i went and ordered me some food and sat down to eat it. This is great people watching time. As I was observing the other customers I noticed a few things. The first was that I was getting alot of looks. Im not sure if this was because I was sitting alone, or because they were taken away with my smoking hot looks(holding in a laugh) or just because I was staring at them doing my people watching:) I think it was a mixture of one and three. Two was just for my own fantasy. I found it funny that people were so concerned that I was sitting alone. I have a husband, a child and lots of friends so I am not sitting here by my self because I am all alone it is just because everyone is doing something else and I am hungry.

The second thing I noticed were the other people that were eating by them self. There was a man that looked like he was on his lunch break, and a younger lady. The interesting thing about these people was how they were acting and what they were doing while eating alone. The younger girl who was probably younger than me but not high school age was on her Phone the whole time. I think at one point she faked a conversation with someone just to look and sound like she had friends. I only got a small part of the conversation but she was basically explaining why she was sitting there eating by her self to someone on the other end. She was doing this just load enough for everyone else to here. The gentleman that was on his lunch break was the funniest. He was working on some papers but he would not even look around or at his food long enough to take a bite. He seemed to want to disappear so no one would notice him. Then he was finished and gone...I don't think he even chewed. Either he just was not comfortable being by him self or he needs to tell his boss he needs a longer lunch break.

so I want to know your thoughts...??? Can you eat alone?

movies

there are like fifty movies i want too see right now and i have no money to do this or time. there is the blindside, new moon, my sisters keeper, couples retreat, whip it, the one about lying i forgot the name, and so many more in the theater and out. But have you seen the prices for going to the movies? its outrages. I could by my self a shirt with the money i would spend on a ticket popcorn and a drink. Then there is renting. They have the 1 dollar rentals at publix but then you have to remeber to take it back after a day and you also have to hope the machine works and they have the movie you want to see. you would think with the economy like it is they would lower prices on movies not hike them up.

now that im done with my rant...im going to see new moon on wed:) ill let you know how it is:)

tired

im so very tired.....of all of it. not just sleep deprived tired but tired. It just seems that stuff is never going to get better. A few weeks ago I told a few of you that someone had hurt my feelings at work. Well it made me start thinking about how well or not well I do at just about everything. Well when you start thinking about all the stuff you do wrong it isn't very uplifting? I have just been slowly going over all aspects of my life and pointing out to my self what im not doing right or to the best of my ability. Its not a small list. I need to turn things around but not sure how to do that when the reality of it all is that things are going to get worse before they get better. I have great friends and family that help me through all of this as well as a pretty good relationship with god and im trying really hard to be positive but its hard. so to those of you that have been here for me thank you. i just needed to vent and thanks for listening....well reading:)

urgent update

so I'm sure all of you have been wondering the answers to the questions regarding The Little Mermaid from an earlier post. I don't want any of you to lose any more sleep so i just found out an answer to one of them. I was watching the little mermaid beginning, today, on the Disney channel and it shows Ariel growing up. It also covers Ariel's mom and why she isn't around. apparently she was killed by some pirates when Ariel was really little. so there you have it you can sleep sound tonight... a mermaid was killed by pirates and left seven children and husband to fend for them selves. Yes this is what is in the movies my child is watching great message right:)

im going out of my mind

so the past few nights have been a nightmare. Cadence has been sleeping in a toddler bed for awhile now but just recently relized she can get up when ever she wants. We have also changed bed time around since she was waking up so early we wanted her to sleep a little later so we moved bed time from sevenish to around 8:30 9:00. But now when I put her down and shut the door she immediatly gets up and comes to the door and walks out. I put her back down and we start again. This goes on for about an hour. She thinks this is a game so nothing I say or do makes her understand stay in the bed. I tell her she will go to time out but that just meens i get to get up. I tell her she will get in trouble and she has to stay in bed. I get very frustrated and im not sure what to do about it. We ahve decided not to spank because how can we tell her not to hit and then do what we tell her not to do? so im out of options. Im hoping and praying this is just a phase and in a week or two she will grow out of it. i don't think anyone who reads this has children but if you do and have any advice I would love it:)

repetition

So Cadence has officially hit the repetition phase in her life. For the past few months she has started repeating her self over and over and over and over and over....sorry it sticks....this is something that I knew would come and im pretty patient so it isn't that big of a deal. On the other hand she is now wanting to watch one thing and one thing only. The Little Mermaid is permanently etched into my head now, since we watch it no less than three times a day..that's right three times a day. Don't get me wrong I love Disney movies and this is one of my favorites but every now and then a little jungle book or 101 Dalmatians would be a relief. Just something else anything else.

And after watching this movie so many times I have some serious questions....like where is Ariel's mother? There is Titan and quite a few other daughters but there is never any mention of the mother who birthed all of these mermaids. And why is it that when Ariel turns into a mermaid on the wedding ship and Ursala turn back into a octopus does no one freak out that mermaids exist? In the beginning of the movie they discuss mermaids and eric doesn't seem to think they exist. But after Eric kills Ursala and Ariel gets married they all seem unfazed by the presence of all the mermaids. Oh and why doesn't Ariel just write her name on a piece of paper and tell Eric she lost her voice recently so he knows it was her that rescued him? I know I'm over thinking this just a bit and it is a kids movie but give me some credit I have watched it over thirty times this week.

heart attack for the hubby

so the last few weeks i have found my self having baby fever....kinda(here is where tommy has the heart attack). I have know for awhile that I wanted another child EVENTUALLY.(now he can breath a little better) I wanted to wait untill we were a little more stable ,financially, than we are now...Also I wanted to wait untill we have a house or a bigger place. well over the last few weeks it has become clear that those two things will not fall into place for around five years or so....this is where the anxt comes in. I wanted our children to be close in age and I wanted them to be out of the house around the same time when we are still young so we can travel and fun stuff like that....but five years puts the age deiffernece at seven years and that is just not what I had planned(life is never how its planned i know). Its just something that has been at the top of my mind for awhile, so i figured I would write about it. It just frustrates me how money runes our lives. if there wasnt a money issue I could have a second child when ever we wanted too. I understand and truely believe we will be ok without money but it still runs our lives and I wish it didn't. so hunny rest easier because im not asking for another baby today :)

ruby red slippers

so today i was at a friends house watching some football....thanks Limbaugh's for having us....I was flipping through one of Lindsey's magazines when I found a pair of shoes that I can not live with out. Here is where we run into a slight problem...They are only 995. That's hundred dollars not 9.95. So you can see where not being able to live without a pair of shoes that by no means I can afford might cause an issue. But they are so awesome...Shiny Patton red with a ruffle on the toe....i tried to find a picture but couldn't but believe me they are incredible. For the inner Dorthy in me they are some killer ruby red slippers. I am being literal with the killer part as well since they have around a 12cm to 14cm heel on them. I think I might be the same height as Tommy if I wore them but only for the two min before I fell flat on my face.

But for those of you who have been kept up late at night trying to figure out what to get me for my birthday next month...this is it. Size 6 I think maybe a 6 and 1/2 Ill make it work.

frustrated with the option

so i know everyone loves options but sometimes I wish some options were never introduced into the situation. We have been struggling with a black cloud for sometime now. It seems to just follow us around. Most people say things happen in threes but for us it happens in fives, sevens and hundreds. Although nothing seems to go right for us I still feel very blessed. I have a great husband, a wonderful child, a roof over my head, food on the table, great family and friends.
The problem I am having is that my wonderful husband came home one day and said he had been talking to a friend at work who had told him about an opportunity over seas with a private company that would pay him anywhere from 10k to 14k a month to do security. He has been having a problem getting a job in his chosen field like the rest of the country. We have tried everything and are still trying daily but he feels like he is not doing his part to take care of this family. I disagree. He is working almost everyday at a job that he isn't thrilled with to make sure we have the things that we do. If he were not taking care of us he would be sitting on his rump and choosing to just wait until something he loved came along.
I love him for everything he does for us and how much he cares about us. But i wish he would have never laid that option on the table because now I feel like a bad wife. I do not by any means want my husband to go to Iraq and risk his life for money. But every time my phone rings and its a bill collector wanting there share my mind wanders to what 10k a month would do for us. No more credit debt no school loans to pay for our business would be paid of completely, all the people we owe money would have there money plus left over for us to buy a house and maybe take that honeymoon we still haven't gotten around too. But MONEY does NOT buy LOVE and HAPPINESS. I know this with every fiber of my being. I trust in God to take care of us and provide for us and this is why im so frustrated with my self. I can't control my thoughts and I hate thinking about it.
So baby im sorry for my thoughts about this. I told you I would never tell you I wanted you to take that job and im telling you the same thing now. I love you and would miss you and worry about you every day but I do want to apologize to you for thinking about the up side of it from time to time. Please forgive me for pondering the material side of things.

football season

so yea the first football game of the season has come and gone...both teams got a W so that is great. my first football weekend on the other hand was not so good. I remember when I was in college and everything revolved around football weekends. Our clothes, our food, our money, and our plans. I had season tickets because I was a student and looking back on it I am very upset with my self for selling most of them because I could make more money working during the game plus selling the ticket then acctually going while I had the chance.

I wish I lived in a perfect world...One where I was wealthy enough to afford season tickets (good seats) and could afford to go to the away games as well. I miss tailgating I miss stadium food and those chillbumps you get when the team takes the field. Also. in this perfect world all of my friends would go for the same team. It's now when i have just sat at home with people im not really friends with and whom don't really care about the game that I realize how I am saddend by the fact all my college friends sucked. I wish all my now friends would have been my then friends too.

One day it will all work out...most of it anyways( i don't think all of my friends are going to suddenly decide to root for Alabama)...I guess the moral of this story is im glad I have great friends that I wish I could spend this time with and Im glad that Football season is back! Roll Tide Roll

Going up

So it has been a rough couple of months/ years for us and over most of it I have tried to be the rock. I think I met my breaking point the other day and as my husband stated I'm getting kinda squishy. Well today something positive happened so I just need it to keep on coming. Our seventeen year old gets to go back home today. They have decided that it is in her best intrest. She freaked out at first because she doesn't want to go back to homewood. But she is seventeen and will get over it. Now I'm sitting in SAMs on there on display patio furniture updating this on my phone because I have run out of aisles to walk up and down. I'm waiting on my tires to be put on and bored out of my
mind. I have discovered that I am hungry after seeing all this food in bulk, that I need a bigger tv, and 300 rills of toilet paper isn't that expensive. Boredom can you tell:)

waiting

so im sitting here at my office waiting on all my apointments to show up. Tommy called all of my brides the other day and set up like 20 apointments this week. He failed to realize he was double and triple booking me but ill forgive him because so far I have had three no shows. This really pisses me off. I have like fifty things i need to be doing around town and I cant leave because my apointments are supposed to be here. When a business says open by apointment only and then you set up an apointment less than a week in advance why the heck can you not show up or at least call and say im sorry im not going to make it or im running late or im a Dumba@*! So here i sit trying very calmly to wait on customers that have had there stuff here forever and have failed to show up once again. do you show up for your doctors apointments or your work apointments? What is so hard about this concept?

hey:)

so i know its been two whole months since i last updated this thing and Im sorry to my very few followers...it has been a couple of crazy months. so my topic for the day is potty training....I want to start really trying to get cadence potty trained but i have no idea how to accomplish this. My first thought was to look at the internet. Did you know that there are like seven differnt methods to potty train your child? The most bizare of them all is to let your child run around with no diaper for two weeks...did you catch that....NO DIAPERS AT ALL. So let me get this straight im supposed to let cadence use the bathroom all over my floors and furniture in the hopes that she decided she needs to use the potty? That sound very dirty and expensive to me. Can you imagine the carpet cleaning bill? So after getting no where with the internet I turned to friends with children. I got so many differnt answers that im back at square one. I don't want to force her to do it but i also dont want to wait untill she is seven either. so im just going to wing it. if there is a mother out there reading this please any tips would be helpful.

I will be updating reguarly now I promise:) dont delete me yet brookie

really thats my fat percentage?

So today was an interesting day...it started out like a normal Sunday with church and friends and then we were off to the pool. Today me and a friend were going to get our measurements for this bootcamp that we signed up for (www.extremefittraining.com). we were told not to eat or drink anything two hours before. Have you ever been told not to eat for a certain time? Its very hard to do! Well anyways we get to the sports place where we get to go into this locker room and have every inch of our body measured. Let me tell you this is not very fun at all. Well then we move over to another line to get into this bean shaped contraption called the bod pod...which is apparently going to tell me how much a weigh and how much fat i have...once again awesome....best day ever. Its like going to the doctor and sitting there for an hour just to go in and have your finger pricked and a shot in the butt and them saying it wasn't that bad. So as we wait in line there are many conversations going on about the bootcamp, the teachers, the steroid guy running the bodpod and the door(please don't slam the door). We each go in and come out with a business card with our weight and percentage of fat write on it...I never thought one number could make me so sad:( Then we exit and are on our way to Milos to get a nice juicy burger. I know you are thinking what the hell you just said you were upset about a number so why not a salad or grilled chicken? Well since we are about to embark on a month of hard core working out and trying very hard to follow some healthy eating habits we wanted one last yummy meal before we start torturing ourselves. So on our way to Milos when guess what drama, drama, drama. You didn't think i could go one day with out drama did you? So i have to go home to deal with another episode involving crazy folks and my little sister. After taking her and dropping her off after the drama has died down I decide well if im going to eat a burger I better do it now since starting tomorrow im giving up fast food burgers and fries for a month. or until next weekend when I really want one:) Me and Cadence go through the milos drive through in wild wood and I get a combo. We pull up to the window and pay as the women hands me a bag with the food. I drive a few feet and Cadence starts demanding for a bite, bite, BITE! So I pull a fry out and have to hold in front of the vent so that it will not scorch her tongue. It finally cools down enough to hand to her. We are driving towards home at this point and I decide im going to eat a few fries myself. The first one is so hot it burns my tongue and I think why did I not hold it front of the vent for myself? So at this point we are driving through vestavia almost at Publix on 31 and I have had a few fries and then i find one that is rather cold and soggy so I hand it to my daughter who after all doesn't need to burn her self. Then i pull another hot fry of the top and pop it in my mouth. When I reach for another one....there all freaking cold as hell...you have to be kidding me. Those dirty milos workers. They just threw a couple of hot fires on top of alot of cold ones and gave it to me so I wouldn't notice until I was almost home and wouldn't turn around because I have a baby in the car and Damn it!!!!!

money does not grow on trees...right?

so i have been searchign for a money tree for years now and I can't seem to locate one. I know that it is out there somewhere because i know people that have to have one. I have more than one friend who don't have jobs and yet they still can spend money liek they are a freaking doctor. I also know some people who have jobs but i know they are not making as much as they are spending so it must be coming from there money tree. so i want one. I want to be able to buy something with out wondering if that is going to be the one thing to overdraft my account. I want to be able to see a nice pair of shoes and just purchase them with out checking two accounts first. By god I want to be able to take a trip with out having to save up for four years to do it. So if anyone out there has a money tree I would love a seed or something so i can grow one of my own:)

whats the point

what is really the point of all the masks and dancing around the real stuff? Why do we always feel a need to keep up the charade? I have been around a whole lot of people through out my life and I feel that I am a pretty good judge of character but my down fall is being to nice and wanting to see the good in people. But lately I have been around some people that well to be honest really frustrate the hell out of me! Why put on a smiling face if you dont mean it? I promise I can tell and it isn't making either of our time any more enjoyable. Also, if you don't like me then by god dont act like you do....I am a strong person and can handle it if you dont. I tried I really did to see the good but sometimes it isn't enough.

new subject

I also feel that I am a pretty good friend. I know how i want to be treated and try my hardest to treat my friends the exact way. With the one exception of having horrible "phone mind"(yes that is a made up thing i just came up with)...i just forget to call people back its not on purpose it just happens. But that said....over the years I haven't kept many of my once friends. They have all gone there separate ways by both my choice and theirs but sometimes I wonder if I am doing something to drive them away. If i am I assure you have no knowledge of what this is and would hope that someone would step up and say hey this is what you do that I do not like and I assure you that I would do everything I could to fix this. But seriously when someone invites me somewhere and I say im going then I dont just not show up and not call to advise of why.....if someone needs me to do something for them and there is nothing life threatening standing in my way then i do it.....I always love to listen and rarely feel the need to burden those around me with my own problems unless they want to here them, and I always want to give my very best for every special occasion in everyone of my friends life's. I know that it is what I would want so im sure they would want the same. But still over the years I haven't kept many of my friends.

These days I feel that I have a really great group of friends. People that I can count on...so if you are one of those people and have an issue with something i have done or do please inform me so i can change.

sorry for the all over the place post i just started writing and this is what you get:)

dreams

Have you ever met my puppy...Aston. I got him when I was in college living alone. My mom told be that I didn't need to get a dog because I could not take care of one. So guess what I did....Got a puppy!!!! He was great he went to all the parties with me as well to all of the parties at our house. He had a blast. I named him Aston after my dream car....since I dont think I will ever have one of those I will settle with my pup...he is just as cute!

what do i have to do

so as you know i started running about five months ago. I have since been in two 5ks and now can really say that the idea of running does not make me want to hurl myself off of a cliff. I have also been trying to watch what i eat....well sometimes anyways....and i just weighed my self and that was not a good idea. Whats a girl got to do to shed a few pounds around here.
I wasnt gaining weight before the running, i was just staying the same so i figured that by adding some excersice would do the trick. I have heard tommy say all the crap excuses and im not buying them. Like im gaining muscle and it weighs more than fat and that I am drinking more water now and that is adding water weight...blah blah blah. I just want to lose a few pounds im not asking for a huge number here just a few freaking pounds. I have not lost anything in five months. Still the same. if anyone has any suggestions I am open to all of them at this point.

long time no type

so it has been awhile since i have written and for those two people that read this im am very sorry. I have just been so caught up in reading, friends,family and bad luck that I just havn't gotten around to it. I am very excited that the warm weather has decided to grace us with her presence. I love the sun and all the funs tuff that goes with it. I cant wait for us to go to the lake every time we get a free chance. The down side.....I am not ready to shop for a new bathing suit and actually wear it out in public. I was hoping this whole running thing would get me down to a shape that I once again could be ok with being in a bathing suit but it hasn't done the trick. I know im not a total fat ass or anything but if only i could look as i did pre baby. I don't think that will ever happen but im still holding out for the sliver of hope.

Inspite all of the bad luck that is following me around these days I for some reason have a cheery attitude towards everything. I have gotten used to everything so i have decided to just go with it. It has to get better one day right?

well that is all for today more tommorow

lots

so it has been a few long weeks. but today was actually a good day. The weather was great the friends were awesome and the family was some what normal. I have been going through so much drama from so many different angles lately that im just warn slap out. Im hoping that things will start to get brighter. On top of everything else it seems I am coming down with an upper respiratory yuckiness. Which leads me to my next segment.

I had my second 5k on Saturday and while I did well on my first one I had higher goals for my self for this one. I wanted to finish with out stopping as well as finish with a lower time. Well I did not accomplish either goal and i have to say that I was very hard on myself for that. I have no excuses for what happened just a recap of the whole thing. It was cold but i was excited. We started up a hill and I thought on the way down this is going to be ok. Then it started....I felt as if a full grown human was sitting on my chest. So i decided to walk for a few minutes and try to get it to stop. Then running again I started to taste blood so I spit and there was blood.(im ok it was just that yucky cold i was talking about) This is when the mental aspect stepped in and I was freaking out that I wasn't ok and that I was sucking. I have an awesome running partner and at this point I wanted to keep up with her but my mind had already given up. This is the part I am disappointed about. I know i should have sucked it up and just run but that is not what happened. I did finish the race and I only was slower by 2 minutes from my first race. I know this isn't horrible seeing as i did walk a lot more than the first one but still i am not happy. So our next race is at the end of may and my goal is to kick ass. I have to redeem my self and bring up my spirits. I want to thank my running buddies and my supporters they were great on saturday and im thankful for them.

boogers

WARNING: If you have a squeamish stomach please do not read.

Thursday morning Cadence woke up not feeling so good. As the weekend has progressed she has gotten worse everyday. She now is running a constant low fever, coughing up flem every few minutes and I believe the green slim from Nickelodeon is streaming out her nose at all times.

Before I had a child I have held many a head over a toilet for a good drunk friend. I have seen some very nasty things on the streets of new Orleans. I have also cleaned up after a few animals in my day. But now i feel that at all times my shirt is covered in some kind of yucky mess. I do not mind whipping a runny nose with my hand if it is the only thing I have at the time. I also have found that I do not mind sticking my nose close to my child's butt knowingly that it is probably not going to smell very good. What happened to me? It is crazy how having a child makes you throw out every personal sense of cleanliness for that of the child.

rain

I love the rain...I hate the waiting for the rain. The humidity out the roof the cloud coverage that makes everything look sad and the feeling that if I leave my comfy couch I just might scare the rain away.
I think I should have been a storm chaser. Im one of the people that step out on the porch when james span is on the tv saying take cover. I love the lightning and the thunder. I have allways wanted to see a tornado. I don't want anyone to get hurt but to see one out in the middle of a field would be incredible.

stress

so stress has become a staple in my life. im not sure that there will ever be a day where something does not go wrong. I know that one day things will get better but for now stress is just like brushing my teeth or getting dressed I know that Tommorow all three of those things will be a part of my day. I have come accustomed to this and accepted it. I have also been trying desperatly to put on a happy face. There are people in my life that need me to be strong. They need me to tell them that everything is going to be ok. And while i know that it will be it is hard to constantly turn on the sunshine. I pray all the time that just one thing will get better so here I sit and wait...thats all I can do is wait...It will happen.

Cadence is my bright spot...she is trying to learn how to jump and it is by far the funniest thing. She bends down and then shoots up and bows out her chest and streches her neck out. She never leaves the ground which makes it all so much funnier.

why is my makeup not on right

so i have given in to the fact that over the last year and half taking a shower everyday is probably not going to happen. So sorry if im a little smelly. I have also come to relize that eating all of my food at any meal is asking a whole lot.

Have you ever been putting on your makeup in the morning, after taking the shortest shower ever, while there is a two foot human holding on to your pants pulling at them while saying " Hold you" "Hold you" repeatadly. It is not very easy to put eyeliner on correctly while someone is standing on both your feet and grabbing at your arms. She is the cutest thing by far but is it wrong of me to want both my eyes to look the same when I walk out of the house.

scream and let it out

so i have had one hell of a life and for those of you who no me...well im assuming some one is reading this.....you have heard bits and peices. For along time I have wanted to write a book about my life. I feel that it would help other people know that you can turn out all right dispite the crap you go through. The problem with this whole idea is I can't write for crap. So awhile back i looked in to having someone write it for me. Did you know that is very expensive. So this is my way to put all my thoughts together and maybe one day I can find someone to put it all on paper.....

So since I was born I have gone by two names...My full name was Jennifer Barrett McClellan. From the stories I have been told my dad wanted to call me Jennifer and my mom wanted to call me Barrett. Im not sure what they called me when they were together for the short time but when the split they went there seperate ways and so did my name. I was Jennifer for the majority of the time since My dad won custody and I was Barrett every other weekend and on Holidays. Can you imagine I was just a little girl. Well when I turned fourteen I decided to move in with my mom and when I did that I decided to start going by Barrett full time. My first day in my new school Homewood High, I met some one and I introduced my self as Barrett and that I came from simmons middle. They asked if I new the new girl Jennifer that was from the same school.

I did!

customers suck the life out of me

so today tommy took off work to watch cadence so i could go to work for the whole day. I received a shipment of frames and needed more than the thirty minutes she allows me to put them together. Since i had scheduled a 9:30 appointment for this morning I woke up and headed in so i could get there and get settled before she arrived. 9:45....she isn't here....10:00 she calls to say she is running late...really i couldn't have guessed. When she finally rolls up at 10:15 acting as if I have done something that has made her late and she really needs to hurry because she can't be late for her next adventure. She picks out her frame and is on her way after taking 45 minutes to make up her mind on something that really only needs 10 to 15 minutes to do.

I start in on my frames....15 min in I get a call from the husband of another customer. I always love getting calls from the husband. Basically it means that the wife has already told me she loves the frame and then something has happened and she no longer is happy with her choice. So now the husband gets to call because she does not have the guts to call. He wants to talk to me about the frame...he thinks that it looks like we bought it from walmart. I advice him that this is the frame that he and his wife both came in and picked out a few months ago. He doesn't care and wants us to refund his money and he wants to keep the frame. Really? yes please let me do this work for you and pay out of my pocket for the cost of your frame and hang it on your wall for the next 30 or 40 years. No thank you!

Drink anyone?

i never said i could write

so..im not sure if blogging is going to be for me but im going to try it anyways. I have so many things my mind all the time and I thought that this may be a good way for me to relieve some of the weight. Let me start off by saying my grammar sucks as well as my spelling so please do not hold it against me. I can blame my father for that. I have a friend that blogs and she is always talking about blog stalking and how she always sees perfect little pictures and I want to assure everyone reading this that I will never paint a perfect picture. I will at times show great and wonderful parts but i will as well show you the parts that I have had to redo or throw away. You will see the pictures hanging on the wall and the ones in the trash can.

So that said...I am a 25 year old married mother that owns her own business. If you would have asked me five years ago if that sentence would be true in five years I would have laughed. I have a 19 month old little girl who is my life. She is my everything and im not sure what I was doing before she came along. It is crazy just how much a child will impact you. I also have two dogs that might as well be under the children category. They both sleep in the bed with me and my husband and while I find myself almost dieing of caustrophobia most nights, I cant imagine it with out them. My husband is well he is my forever. My whole life I have dated people that have brought joy in my life and had parts of them that have been great. Until I met Tommy I had never found the whole package. I hadn't found my other half.

So not to go on to long and tell you more than you want to know on the first go around im going to stop for today...not to mention I have been on the phone this whole time with att tech support trying to get my new phone...iPhone club whop whop.... to allow me to text my forever(tommy). Weird how it will allow me to text everyone else but not my husband.